How do I wean my baby?!

I don't know why, but it seems like whenever it comes time to wean a baby, I get complete amnesia.

Although I know I have weaned before, I can't quite remember at what point I got the guts to do so. I also draw a blank when it comes to what exactly "my methods" were during the weaning process. All I remember is that at some point, I got enough gusto and the determination to "go for broke" when it came to keeping a large toddler from hanging off my breasts!

Anne Smith, a Breastfeeding Basics writer, explains;

Webster’s Dictionary defines weaning as “accustoming a young mammal to take food otherwise than by nursing.” Although this event may be very cut and dried in the animal world, for humans the process of weaning is much more complicated, but only because we make it that way. Weaning your baby is part of the natural breastfeeding experience. It doesn’t have to be a time of unhappiness for you or your baby. If done “gradually, and with love” (the La Leche League motto), weaning can be a positive experience for both you and your little one.

That sounds real simple, doesn't it? None of my weaning experiences have gone that smoothly. My experiences usually involve the "crying it out method" to some degree. It seems like allowing children to self-wean would be a much easier route. However, I am usually too pregnant, weak, and exhausted, to wait.

At this point, I am not pregnant. However, I could be classified under the "weak and exhausted" category. So, I am about ready to wean my sweet Halle.

Do you remember when you weaned your babies? Was it ugly? Was it easy? Feel free to share your wisdom and experiences in the comments section!

On Nursing

I had a "moment" as I was holding Halle. I realized how much I love having a little baby. Moreover, I realized how much I have come to love nursing!

When Noelle was a newborn, someone (who happened to be a mother of 11), asked me if I was going to breastfeed. I half-heartedly said "yes" and was shocked when this mom of 11 told me that I was going to love it. I was so confused by her notion. I just didn't get it. Why would anyone love having to have a baby sucking on their nipple all the time? In my "liberated" mind, the entire concept sounded a little too "confining." But now...I get it.

[Photo Credit: AlyssssylA]

British author and obstetrician, Grantly-Dick Read explains;

A newborn baby has only 3 needs. They are warmth in the arms of its mother, food from her breast, and security in the knowledge of her presence. Breastfeeding satisfies all three.

I would admonish any new mom to breastfeed, if possible. When you are breastfeeding you are doing more than just feeding your baby. You are comforting, bonding with, and lavishing love on your baby. The experience is not only priceless, but one of the God-given privileges that has uniquely been given to women.

It is only in the act of nursing that a woman realizes her motherhood in visible and tangible fashion; it is a joy of every moment. ~Honore de Balzac

Breastfeeding Beyond the First Year

Most of the breastfeeding moms that I know usually try to breastfeed for at least a year. That is usually my goal as well. Nevertheless, after reading "Breastfeeding and Natural Child Spacing: How Ecological Breastfeeding Spaces Babies" by Sheila Kippley, I became more open to the idea of going longer.

As a result, I breastfed Bella for 15 months. I am considering going longer with Noah. I don't think many people realize how many benefits exist for both mother and babies when mom extends her breastfeeding past a year. Thus, many people seem to be generally uncomfortable with the idea of it.

Below you will find some articles that outline the benefits of extended nursing for both mom and baby!

Breastfeeding:

Benefits Beyond the First Year

Post-Pregnancy News Flash
-- By Becky Hand, Licensed & Registered Dietitian

For both mother and child to receive the variety of proven health benefits, the World Health Organization (WHO) recommends mothers breastfeed their children up to 2 years of age and beyond. Due to social stigmas, breastfeeding older children (past one year of age) is often considered taboo and therefore done behind closed doors. A recent survey conducted in Australia collected information from breastfeeding moms (ages 21-45) who were currently breastfeeding children between 24 and 78 months old. The mothers answered survey questions, but were also given a list of questions to ask their breastfed child.

Typical responses from the moms:

• I enjoy breastfeeding my child.
• I feel it strengthens our relationship.
• My child still enjoys breastfeeding and doesn't want to wean.
• Breastfeeding is easier.
• Breastfeeding helps to comfort my child.
• I breastfeed for intimacy and closeness with my child.
• My child likes the taste of breast milk.
• 75% of the mothers did not intend to breastfeed past 12 months. However they delayed weaning because of increased confidence and knowledge about breastfeeding, along with their child's enjoyment as well as their own.

Extended Breastfeeding Fact Sheet

By Kelly Bonyata, BS, IBCLC

Nursing toddlers benefit NUTRITIONALLY

• Although there has been little research done on children who breastfeed beyond the age of two, the available information indicates that breastfeeding continues to be a valuable source of nutrition and disease protection for as long as breastfeeding continues.

• "Human milk expressed by mothers who have been lactating for >1 year has significantly increased fat and energy contents, compared with milk expressed by women who have been lactating for shorter periods. During prolonged lactation, the fat energy contribution of breast milk to the infant diet might be significant."
  -- Mandel 2005

• "Breast milk continues to provide substantial amounts of key nutrients well beyond the first year of life, especially protein, fat, and most vitamins."
  -- Dewey 2001

• In the second year (12-23 months), 448 mL of breastmilk provides:
  • 29% of energy requirements
  • 43% of protein requirements
  • 36% of calcium requirements
  • 75% of vitamin A requirements
  • 76% of folate requirements
  • 94% of vitamin B₁₂ requirements
  • 60% of vitamin C requirements
  -- Dewey 2001

• Studies done in rural Bangladesh have shown that breastmilk continues to be an important source of vitamin A in the second and third year of life.
  -- Persson 1998

• It's not uncommon for weaning to be recommended for toddlers who are eating few solids. However, this recommendation is not supported by research. According to Sally Kneidel in "Nursing Beyond One Year" (New Beginnings, Vol. 6 No. 4, July-August 1990, pp. 99-103.):

  Some doctors may feel that nursing will interfere with a child's appetite for other foods. Yet there has been no documentation that nursing children are more likely than weaned children to refuse supplementary foods. In fact, most researchers in Third World countries, where a malnourished toddler's appetite may be of critical importance, recommend continued nursing for even the severely malnourished (Briend et al, 1988; Rhode, 1988; Shattock and Stephens, 1975; Whitehead, 1985). Most suggest helping the malnourished older nursing child not by weaning but by supplementing the mother's diet to improve the nutritional quality of her milk (Ahn and MacLean. 1980; Jelliffe and Jelliffe, 1978) and by offering the child more varied and more palatable foods to improve his or her appetite (Rohde, 1988; Tangermann, 1988; Underwood, 1985).

References

Nursing toddlers are SICK LESS OFTEN

• The American Academy of Family Physicians notes that children weaned before two years of age are at increased risk of illness (AAFP 2001).

• Nursing toddlers between the ages of 16 and 30 months have been found to have fewer illnesses and illnesses of shorter duration than their non-nursing peers (Gulick 1986).

• "Antibodies are abundant in human milk throughout lactation" (Nutrition During Lactation 1991; p. 134). In fact, some of the immune factors in breastmilk increase in concentration during the second year and also during the weaning process. (Goldman 1983, Goldman & Goldblum 1983, Institute of Medicine 1991).

• Per the World Health Organization, "a modest increase in breastfeeding rates could prevent up to 10% of all deaths of children under five: Breastfeeding plays an essential and sometimes underestimated role in the treatment and prevention of childhood illness." [emphasis added]

References

Nursing toddlers have FEWER ALLERGIES

• Many studies have shown that one of the best ways to prevent allergies and asthma is to breastfeed exclusively for at least 6 months and continue breastfeeding long-term after that point.
  
  Breastfeeding can be helpful for preventing allergy by:
  1. reducing exposure to potential allergens (the later baby is exposed, the less likely that there will be an allergic reaction),
  2. speeding maturation of the protective intestinal barrier in baby's gut,
  3. coating the gut and providing a barrier to potentially allergenic molecules,
  4. providing anti-inflammatory properties that reduce the risk of infections (which can act as allergy triggers).

References

Nursing toddlers are SMART

• Extensive research on the relationship between cognitive achievement (IQ scores, grades in school) and breastfeeding has shown the greatest gains for those children breastfed the longest.

References

Nursing toddlers are WELL ADJUSTED SOCIALLY

• According to Sally Kneidel in "Nursing Beyond One Year" (New Beginnings, Vol. 6 No. 4, July-August 1990, pp. 99-103.):
  
  "Research reports on the psychological aspects of nursing are scarce. One study that dealt specifically with babies nursed longer than a year showed a significant link between the duration of nursing and mothers' and teachers' ratings of social adjustment in six- to eight-year-old children (Ferguson et al, 1987). In the words of the researchers, 'There are statistically significant tendencies for conduct disorder scores to decline with increasing duration of breastfeeding.'"

• According to Elizabeth N. Baldwin, Esq. in "Extended Breastfeeding and the Law":
  "Breastfeeding is a warm and loving way to meet the needs of toddlers and young children. It not only perks them up and energizes them; it also soothes the frustrations, bumps and bruises, and daily stresses of early childhood. In addition, nursing past infancy helps little ones make a gradual transition to childhood."

• Baldwin continues: "Meeting a child's dependency needs is the key to helping that child achieve independence. And children outgrow these needs according to their own unique timetable." Children who achieve independence at their own pace are more secure in that independence then children forced into independence prematurely.

References

Nursing a toddler is NORMAL

• The American Academy of Pediatrics recommends that "Breastfeeding should be continued for at least the first year of life and beyond for as long as mutually desired by mother and child... Increased duration of breastfeeding confers significant health and developmental benefits for the child and the mother... There is no upper limit to the duration of breastfeeding and no evidence of psychologic or developmental harm from breastfeeding into the third year of life or longer." (AAP 2005)

• The American Academy of Family Physicians recommends that breastfeeding continue throughout the first year of life and that "Breastfeeding beyond the first year offers considerable benefits to both mother and child, and should continue as long as mutually desired." They also note that "If the child is younger than two years of age, the child is at increased risk of illness if weaned." (AAFP 2001)

• A US Surgeon General has stated that it is a lucky baby who continues to nurse until age two. (Novello 1990)

• The World Health Organization emphasizes the importance of nursing up to two years of age or beyond (WHO 1992, WHO 2002).

• Scientific research by Katherine A. Dettwyler, PhD shows that 2.5 to 7.0 years of nursing is what our children have been designed to expect (Dettwyler 1995).

References [see also position statements supporting breastfeeding]

MOTHERS also benefit from nursing past infancy

• Extended nursing delays the return of fertility in some women by suppressing ovulation (References).

• Breastfeeding reduces the risk of breast cancer (References). Studies have found a significant inverse association between duration of lactation and breast cancer risk.

• Breastfeeding reduces the risk of ovarian cancer (References).

• Breastfeeding reduces the risk of uterine cancer (References).

• Breastfeeding reduces the risk of endometrial cancer (References).

• Breastfeeding protects against osteoporosis. During lactation a mother may experience decreases of bone mineral. A nursing mom's bone mineral density may be reduced in the whole body by 1 to 2 percent while she is still nursing. This is gained back, and bone mineral density may actually increase, when the baby is weaned from the breast. This is not dependent on additional calcium supplementation in the mother's diet. (References).

• Breastfeeding reduces the risk of rheumatoid arthritis. (References).

• Breastfeeding has been shown to decrease insulin requirements in diabetic women (References).

Breastfeeding moms tend to lose weight easier (References

Breastfeeding Moms Hold Nurse-In

Dozens of women gathered in Lincoln Square Friday to publicly breastfeed their babies in a nurse-in protesting against harassment.

Rogers Park mother Lauren Trost says she was threatened when breastfeeding her infant son last month at a public fountain in Lincoln Square. Illinois law ensures that women can breastfeed, without a cover-up, in public. Friday's demonstration was intended as a very public affirmation of that right (Huffington Post, 9/4/09).

Since I have been Ecological Breastfeeding, I nurse on demand and I don't use bottles or pacifiers. As you can imagine, this means that I pretty much take my baby with me everywhere I go, unless I can go and come back in a very short time.

As a result, I definitely am a proponent of public nursing and was a little appalled that this Rogers Park mother was harassed for nursing her baby on a park bench. Breast are for nursing. Nursing is natural. Furthermore,when my kids gotta eat, my kids gotta eat, right?

The women in the nurse-in commented on the fact it is the over-sexualization of breast in this country that causes people to view breast as "men's toys" instead of the equipment God has given us to nourish and comfort our children. I agree with that statement, but after reading more into this story I discovered a twist.

Lauren Trost, the woman who was threatened said that she was asked by the other women:

“...‘Do you have a blanket?’” Trost recalled Friday. “I said, ‘It’s 90 degrees out -- of course I don’t have a blanket.’”

The offended woman threatened to call the police, Trost said.

“She was very unhappy that I continued breastfeeding--so unhappy that she approached all of the other women on the benches and said, ‘Look at that woman. It’s indecent and it’s illegal,’” Trost recalled(Chicago Sun-Times, 9/4/09).

Then a man who was interviewed nearby the nurse-in said:

“I just don’t think it’s proper for women to show their breasts out in public unless they’re on the beach,” said Jeff Hooker, 47, recently unemployed and living in Lincoln Square(Chicago Sun-Times, 9/4/09).

AH-HA! It seems like this debate is not as much about public nursing as it is about modest-public nursing!

While I am all for public nursing, I don't think that public nursing is an excuse for flashing! If you are nursing your baby in public without a blanket or a nursing bib, then I can see how others would feel uncomfortable. Furthermore, I think that if women were more discreet and modest while they nursed in public, it may be more accepted by the general public.

Even when it is hot outside, a thin receiving blanket or nursing bib can help a mother nurse modestly in the heat. I have sat at a table with a blanket over me while nursing in public, and strangers have come up and held an entire conversation with me, never realizing that I was not just holding a sleeping baby under the blanket! When I didn't have a blanket , I have sat in the air-conditioned car and stood up in a public bathroom stall in order to feed my baby while out. Wearing the right clothing and nursing bras can also aid in the feasibility of modest-public nursing.

Breastfeeding is God's design for natural mothering. When it is done modestly, we can actually glorify God by being examples of women who are nurturing, comforting, and bonding with their babies in a society that frowns on children and has lost sight of the importance and dignity of motherhood.

Ecological Breastfeeding

When our second daughter was about four months old, I believe it was God that ordered my steps of find out about the book, "Breastfeeding and Natural Child Spacing: How Ecological Breastfeeding Spaces Babies" by Sheila KIppley. I already had a desire to nurse my baby on demand, but the book opened my eyes to a new way of mothering. Now, I plan on taking the ecological breastfeeding approach with all of my children.


Here is more from Sheila Kippley on "Scriptural Mothering":


SCRIPTURAL MOTHERING
In Scripture breastfeeding is usually associated with a special kind of care, a human example of God’s loving care for his people. We read of the nursing mother or of the child who is nursing or is weaned. Mothering is mentioned several times in Scripture and is often associated with breastfeeding.

What follows are biblical references to breastfeeding and/or mothering1 that may be helpful and supportive to parents, especially mothers. The Scripture quotes appear in the order they appear in Catholic bibles.

“And the child grew, and was weaned; and Abraham made a great feast on the day that Isaac was weaned” (Genesis 21:8).
Here we read for the first time in the Bible of a child being weaned. Prolonged nursing of several years was common during Biblical times, and weaning was a cause for celebration of the child’s new stage in development.

Hannah: “As soon as the child is weaned, I will bring him, that he may appear to the presence of the Lord, and abide there for ever.”
Elkanah, Hannah’s husband: “Do what seems best to you, wait until you have weaned him” (1 Samuel 1:22-23)

Breastfeeding keeps Hannah with her baby. Hannah’s household planned to travel to Shiloh to offer a yearly sacrifice at the house of the Lord. Hannah excused herself because she was breastfeeding her child. Her husband supported her in that decision. Scripture then said: “So the mother remained and nursed her son, until she weaned him.” After the child weaned, she made the trip with her son, Samuel, and gave him to the Lord forever in the care of a priest and prophet.

Many husbands today support the mother-baby oneness of breastfeeding, and for this their wives are most appreciative. Hannah cared for her son during the early years of breastfeeding. When the breastfeeding ended, she then gave her son to the Lord.

When couples anticipate the conception of a new baby, they, like Hannah, can offer this child to the Lord and pray that the child grows up to do the will of the Lord. At the time of weaning, the mother or the parents, like Hannah, can offer the child spiritually to the Lord and pray that the child will grow up in the ways of the Lord.

“Thou didst keep me safe upon my mother’s breasts” (Psalms 22:9).
The psalmist describes breastfeeding as safe or protective. A nursing baby or toddler often seeks security at his mother’s breasts when hurt or insecure or upset for some reason. While this behavior is common among breastfed babies, it is also described in Scripture.

“…like a child quieted at its mother’s breast” (Psalms 131:2).
Here comfort nursing is described perfectly! One of the advantages of breastfeeding is that suckling has a quieting effect upon the child. A nursing mother soon learns that nursing is an easy way to pacify her baby into a deep sleep or to comfort her baby.

“Can a woman forget her suckling child, that she should have no compassion on the son of her womb?” (Isaiah 49:15)
The Sacred Author used the bond that develops with breastfeeding to illustrate the enduring bond of God to his people.

“…that you may suck and be satisfied with her consoling breasts” (Isaiah 66:11).
Comfort nursing is again described in Scripture. “Consoling breasts” is a wonderful definition of the mothering that takes place at the breast. Hunger satisfied, intimate closeness to mother, a wonderful answer to fatigue and the need for sleep, physical reassurance, pacification…many needs are fulfilled at the breast.

“…and you shall suck, you shall be carried upon her hip, and dandled upon her knees” (Isaiah 66:12).
Here a mother has close physical contact with her nursing baby. There is much holding and carrying of the baby by the mother. The baby is described as being on the mother’s hip and being danced upon her knees. Today this type of baby care is often called attachment parenting. And it is described in Scripture!

1. The Holy Bible, Revised Standard Version, Thomas Nelson Publishers for Ignatius Press, 1966.
Copyright 2006, Sheila Kippley