It is Finished!

Hubby and I were married by the time we were 21 and 22, parents by 23 and 24, homeowners and parents of 4 kiddos by 28 and 29. Needless to say, our twenties were jam packed by life changing and beautiful moments as well as major responsibilities. In many ways, those years are a blur. A few years ago, when we began to evaluate where we were and were we headed as a family, we felt strongly that there were some desired steps that we had not taken.

Being the sole breadwinner, my hubby had focused much of his energies on being successful in the workplace and supporting his family. Nevertheless, we both agreed that for what we hoped to accomplish in the earth during our time here, graduate school was still on our life's to-do list. We found out about a great Masters program that equips professionals with leadership, management, and effective communication skills at our alma mater, Northwestern University. Hubby applied, was accepted, and began classes in fall 2015.

It has not been not easy. Hubby has been in class nearly every Saturday since September. There were many late nights and assignments that were done on airplanes and in cars when he had to travel for work. There have been moments of sacrifice and sheer exhaustion. However, my hubby has completed all of his program requirements and will graduate this Saturday!

I am super proud of my husband for investing in himself and accomplishing one of his goals! On to the next!

Do you have dreams or goals you have put off for a more convienent time or because of fear? I am here to tell you, its not too late!

“People generally fall into one of three groups: the few who make things happen, the many who watch things happen, and the overwhelming majority who have no notion of what happens. Every person is either a creator of fact or a creature of circumstance. He either puts color into his environment, or, like a chameleon, takes color from his environment.”      ― Myles Munroe, Understanding Your Potential

World Changing - Haiti Missions Trip 2016

We are half way through 2016 and there are many exciting details to share!

One of my favorite happens to be that hubby attended his first "formal" missions trip in July! The missions trip was sponsored by our church and the team had such an amazing time. Below are some pictures on my hubby hanging out with members of the missions team and preaching the gospel in Haiti!

On skipping and the wonders of childhood.

My Halle is currently 4 years old and she skips. And I mean she skips everywhere! In the kitchen, up the stairs, to the school bus, around the house, in the driveway. I must tell you, it brings me so much joy to see her skipping.

One of my favorite bloggers - Katherine from www.raisingfive.com, wrote this about motherhood:

I will never forget a conversation I had with my mom once. I was an exhausted young mother, drowning in the incessance of the job, (is that a word, even?). Somewhere in the middle of my dronings about the difficulty I was facing, she got quiet and said, "When I think about the years with you kids at home [there were four of us], it's almost like it was all a dream."

Now that I am but two years away from my first child leaving home I am beginning to understand what she meant.

These years are frustrating, tiring, monotonous, tedious. I have never been so angry, so bewildered, so entirely consumed with discouragement, fear, or doubt.

And yet...they are filled with a kind of wonder and happiness and hope and the breathtaking exhilaration of looking up one day and realizing that that amorphous blip on the sonogram suddenly resembles a mature young man or woman (or, depending on where you are, maybe they are just getting, say, potty trained). And that the circle of life is about to come around and give you whiplash.

I completely identify with Katherine's sentiments and they bring so much perspective. I became a mother at the age of 23. Now, at 33, I realize how completely not ready I was and how difficult that adjustment was for me. In some respect, I have heard moms who started their families at a much later age than I, express similar frustrations and struggles similar to what I experienced transitioning into parenthood. Perhaps certain frustrations just come with the territory. Nevertheless, now that I am ten years in (I cannot believe I have a 10-year-old, but that is another post), I can see how indeed time is fleeting. It is really beginning to feel like the past years (when I was pregnant and breastfeeding, and trying to control toddlers) now almost feels like a dream.

If I could go back some 5-10 years, I think I would have relaxed a bit. I would not have been so focused on being the perfect homemaker or mother. Instead, I would have taken more time to savor sweet and delightful things like lullabies, silly songs, and skipping.

So, yep. That's all I have for you today...skipping. I am enjoying it very much at the moment and hoping she doesn't stop anytime soon :-)

Thankful, Thankful, Thankful!

Happy Thanksgiving weekend everybody!

There is so much to be thankful for! I am particularly thankful for my hubby, Noelle, Bella, Noah, and Halle. I am praising God for my parents and my brother as well who God has really blessed in many ways this year! I'm so thankful for my extended family and friends!

We have really enjoyed Thanksgiving this year! Hubby and I made turkey, dressing, greens, sweet potatoes, baked macaroni and cheese, and sweet potato pie! We ate, and ate, and ate...

now we can barely move. 

Still, we had so much fun. On Wednesday, the kids did a Thanksgiving craft and had a ball painting. They we a mess! On Thursday, we all went to church to hear a friend preach at  Hazel Crest Assembly Church. We we blessed by the message: "Not Broken."

We came home and I set our table with help from Bella. This was the first year that I had my turkey platter, tablecloth, and used place settings. Noelle and Bella had the pleasure of writing our names on each turkey setting. 

We had the children go around and say what they were thankful for and Noah looked at Bella and said, "I'm thankful for you. I love you!" It was kind of random, but so cute. He also said he was thankful for his sisters. As a matter of fact, I think that everyone essentially said that they were thankful for each other, which is a good thing since we have to live with each other, under under one roof, for many years to come!

After dinner, we drove to hubby's grandmother's house and ate again with his family. When we got done with that we ate again at my aunt's house with my family. I am sure you can imagine that after we stubbled to our car and managed to drive ourselves home, the only thing we had enough strength to do was to pull the cover up over us after we fell in the bed!!

Here are some pictures for your viewing pleasure...

Testimony - Anthony Brown and Group Therapy

This is my JAM right now!  Hallelujah!

 

Hello 30!

Hi blogoshpere! It's been an long time. I guess you could say I took an unofficial "summer break" from blogging. 

Not only have I not been writing on my own blog, but I haven't been doing much blog reading either. I'd have to say the break was needed and I think its helpful to step away from "the public" (meaning various forms of social media) from time to time. I think it offers us a time to really "be in the moment." Nevertheless, I have to say that I am eager to get back! : ) 

Among many things that have transpired in the past few months, your girl turned 30! Yes! 30! Many are sad to see the 20's go. But, I am not. I see 30 in a very favorable light! 

It's not that my 20's weren't blessed. They were wonderful. I started courting the man of my dreams at 20. Spent my 21st birthday in Ghana, West Africa. Graduated from the college of my choice and was married in the same month at 21. Started my first "real" job around the same time, got a first apartment, first car, and officially became a "real" adult with "real" bills and "real" issues. I was blessed. 

I was blessed to have 4 children in my 20's. I was pregnant with Noelle by 22. Pregnant with Bella at 24. Pregnant with Noah by 26 and had Halle at 28. We closed on our house on my 28th birthday. Remember that? That was a mountain top birthday. What I didn't see coming was that by my next birthday I would be in a valley so low, I would be struggling to think straight.

The day before my 29th birthday, after months of chronic pain, I got a call to confirm something that I was fearing - that I had 3 bulging disc in the lower spine and that it looked like I had pregnancy-related arthritis in my pelvic joints. That news was followed up by the report that there was nothing that could be done about the bulges or the arthritis. But, I could find relief through physical therapy, strengthening my core and pelvic muscles, and perhaps some steroid shots for the pain. So, I spent my 29th birthday running in and out of bathrooms, so I could appear happy and no one would see me crying. Not a good birthday. 

It is hard to believe that was a year ago. Things were looking very bad. At that point, I was so glad that Jesus said all we needed was the faith the size of a mustard seed, because that was just about all I could muster up - if that. I wrote more about my physical issues and struggles with depression during that time in this post, if you are interested. Nevertheless, I'm so grateful that my story didn't end there, although it felt like it was. So, what happened next? If you know anything about how Jesus works, I bet you can guess.

I can tell you that really big test, harsh, brutal, earth-shaking test, ones that go on a long time, ones that shake your faith to the core - show you who God really is.  They also reveal who you really are. They show you what God has put in you. They also bring your doubts and fears to the surface. Once you've hung in there long enough, they bring your conviction, your grit, your fight to the surface. They strengthen your resolution.

I can tell you that God is in those test with you. Yes, right there in that mess! Right down there in the mud. Even though I was mad at Him, mad at people, and mad at myself, he was still there. He ministered to me, comforted me, strengthened me, healed me, and counseled me. He helped me make sense of some things I could not understand and to let go of some things I could not understand. At one point it was the classic, "Now, why would you let this happen to me when I was trusting you?!" question.  

Come on. I know you've been there too. If its not "Why did you allow this to happen to me" its the "Why did you allow this to happen to them?" question. Both are a doozy. God told Job, "Where was thou when I laid the foundations of the earth? Declare if thou has understanding." (Job 38:4).  One day, after I got tired of shaking my fist at the heavens and saw that I was in a fight I was going to lose, He had a little talk like that with me. He may have had one or two with you as well. 

And so I learned, when you get tired enough and humble yourself, God gives you grace to get to the place that Job gets to when he declares, "...I have uttered that which I understood not; Things too wonderful for me, which I knew not." (Job 42:3). You realize that there is no way you are going to figure out life, let alone figure out God. You have to just let God be God and stick around. Take it from me, there is so much peace once you reach that point.

’Tis so sweet to trust in Jesus, Just to take Him at His Word; Just to rest upon His promise, And to know, “Thus saith the Lord!”

So, here I am now at 30. I am doing much better. I can see the sun shining. I am still back and forth to the doctor. I still feel some aches and pains. But, they are not as severe at they were last year. I can do more, move more, sleep better, live better. I am believing that in time, they will go away completely. 

After all of the mountains and valleys that I experienced in my 20's,  30 is so exciting to me because I have something I didn't have much of at 20 - experience. I have experience with life, experience with people, and experience with God. Its a very different feeling to be going at something as a novice as opposed to one who has been at it for a while. 

A seasoned person has both success and failures to glean from. A seasoned person has already established a foundation. A seasoned person has more patience. A seasoned person is sober enough to know that there will be more mountain tops as well as valleys on the journey ahead, but that both serve a purpose. A seasoned person knows that in all work there is profit, even if it seems slow coming. 

A seasoned person doesn't waste so much time trying to understand and control everything, because they've already been down that road a time or two (or three;) A seasoned person doesn't feel the need to spend so much time looking at those around them in order to gauge whether they are on the right track or not. They already know the track they should be on. A seasoned person can reach back to the person behind them and say, "Watch out for that pitfall, that's the one I feel in!" I LOVE that! 

I am so excited to walk into this new season of my life. Hello 30! 

Still Can't Get Enough

My hubby's Facebook status reads:

"8 years of marriage and I still can't get enough of this woman."

160 people have hit the "like" button on this status, which has had to have broken some kind of record!

I feel the same way about my husband. I am still excited to be his wife. I feel so blessed to be with him and I'm glad God brought us together. I am looking forward to many more years with him!

Here is a picture of us 8 years ago today...

A friend of mine created this video of our family as a gift to us. It capture our family's growth beautifully!

The Vision

When a man has a vision, determination, and God on his side, not much can stand in his way.

My man had a vision of a cozy house...



that his children could grow up in...

that his family could enjoy...



that wouldn't be complete without a hammock in the backyard...







and a happy wife...

And God has brought it to pass. Ain't God good?

Delight thyself also in the LORD; and he shall give thee the desires of thine heart.

Commit thy way unto the LORD; trust also in him; and he shall bring it to pass. (Psalm 37:4-5)